Jimmy Tuman, National Youth Speaker

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TEEN VIOLENCE

Like other groups in our society, teens must deal with the potential for violence in their lives, however teens are much less equipped to deal with it. The potential with pre-teens is much lower (though sadly, still present). Adults also have the potential of violence in their lives, although many are more emotionally and physically able to cope with it.

"Teen violence" actually encompasses several issues: violence done by a teen, violence done by a teen's friend, violence done to a teen, and violence done to a teen's friend. All are horrific, but of key interest are violence done by a teen's friend and done to a teen's friend.

We can no doubt too easily anticipate the reaction of a teen to violence against their friend: more violence. Why would the teen become violent? More importantly, why do we assume the teen would become violent?

Think about that last question for a few moments. Why do we assume the teen would become violent? Are we providing them with role models that teach violence as a legitimate tool for solving problems? Are we teaching them, as the young lady in one of our letters writes, to value being "honest" and "making a difference for someone else?"




Now please know that I'm not picking on anyone here. Humans are highly intelligent and capable of all emotional extremes, including that increasingly rare jewel called "love". It's been my experience that everyone, young, old, blonde, brunette, redhead, male, female needs love in their life. It is instinctively prized above all else and our very souls crave to have and to give it.

And alas, therein lies the rub. Our teens want to both have and to give love. They know those are the keys to truly fulfilling their evolving self image. But when a teen no longer feels connected with the adults and other positive influences in their lives, they seek to give their love to peer groups in hopes of receiving acceptance and love from their new connections.

Read that last bit again: "when a teen no longer feels connected." Feels! It's not whether we think our connection to our teenagers is strong, it is solely about how they perceive us! We have to watch harder and with softer hearts as our young ones struggle to break through the egg of adolescence into adulthood. It's a hard battle, and if we win it, it's a battle the teens will never see. But it's a battle for, sometimes literally, their lives and it's a battle fought only with love.



Read Jimmy's Open Letter To Schools

Download Jimmy's
Self Directed Goals Program

Download Jimmy's Circle of Influence handout.



Email: jim@jimtuman.com

Phone: 248-585-1515

wwwJimmysKids.com


Jimmy Tuman


      "Happy People Live Outside Themselves."


     

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